Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
