The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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