why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize