he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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