matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize