Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
