ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
