It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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