why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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