The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
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