I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
