Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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