Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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