My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
