He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
