Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
