ugly people sure do ruin things
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
