yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
