A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
