If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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