yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I got inside last night via doggy door
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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