party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Randomize
