Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
