at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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