I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize