is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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