U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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