He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize