haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Thank you for not boning my boss.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
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