just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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