absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
