Texts From Last Night

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  (424): View more from California

  You hurt me so bad and it feels so good

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  (424): You hurt me so bad and it feels so good http://tfl.nu/hvpg
  Replies (4) Good night (1567) Bad night (727)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.

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  (303): Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper. http://tfl.nu/rq4b
  Replies (68) Good night (9004) Bad night (811)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.

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  (248): My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while. http://tfl.nu/9oye
  Replies (8) Good night (3984) Bad night (724)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME

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  (979): I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME http://tfl.nu/ljwk
  Replies (35) Good night (1104) Bad night (4422)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand

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  (215): it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand http://tfl.nu/1wqs
  Replies (11) Good night (3982) Bad night (708)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.

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  (631): I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week. http://tfl.nu/88zi
  Replies (14) Good night (758) Bad night (2934)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed

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  (617): i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed http://tfl.nu/c1fn
  Replies (7) Good night (4683) Bad night (973)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'

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  (484): I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock' http://tfl.nu/bqqm
  Replies (12) Good night (4821) Bad night (926)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance

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  (724): I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance http://tfl.nu/bc1t
  Replies (21) Good night (3522) Bad night (1041)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want

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  (702): whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want http://tfl.nu/m1hp
  Replies (39) Good night (7147) Bad night (1519)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem

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  (610): I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem http://tfl.nu/q0gs
  Replies (6) Good night (2254) Bad night (1311)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Topless dodge ball cldnt top that

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  (619): Topless dodge ball cldnt top that http://tfl.nu/nbsl
  Replies (6) Good night (893) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.

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  (515): He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real. http://tfl.nu/6hyc
  Replies (6) Good night (785) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".

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  (908): I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl". http://tfl.nu/m866
  Replies (0) Good night (493) Bad night (213)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"

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  (256): Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision" http://tfl.nu/n4ob
  Replies (5) Good night (315) Bad night (641)

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