So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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