Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
