I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
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Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
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he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober