So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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