I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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