During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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