im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
