Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip