I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.