party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.