Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
People in love make me want to vomit
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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