im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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