Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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