just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize