How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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