There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
