Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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