It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize