dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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