When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Ladies don't puke and tell
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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