Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
